The Silencing

Withdrawal, fear, missed opportunities, indecision, suppressed feelings, blockages, sleepless nights, anxiety, ego issues, pride, low self esteem, mind over the heart, gossip, negative influence, lack of confidence, codependency, staying in the comfort zone, fear of rejection and confrontation, mask wearing, hiding behind morals, closed heart, depression, faking happiness, stagnation, work abuse, addictions, lying to oneself, denying own dreams and wishes, mediocrity, boredom, depending on the opinions of others, fear of vulnerability, inner emptiness, silencing the voice of intuition, running from oneself, inability to receive and express love….

Wading through the depths of the self is a dark, thick wood. Ready or not, I am in it now. I think the problem with optimism in the face of the cruel reality of the culture we live in is that it cuts us off from ourselves. It is a sickness. False optimism, this obsession with finding, faking, worshipping ‘happiness’ – it is a murderous endeavor. An attempt to kill off the truth of what is really going on inside. It is unsafe and insane to deny that the darkness is real. You can stab the truth as often as you like but it will never die.


Quote source: Karolina

4 Replies to “The Silencing”

  1. You’re a phenomenal writer, Allison. I’m coming up on 30 years clean in a little more than a week, and you’re doing a great job describing what early recovery can be like. It’s not always dark, not forever, at least. Except for when it is…

    Liked by 1 person

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