Glass Touch (audio)

The truth is I thought it would all be different. That it would end or not end and I wouldn’t care either way. It’s so scary to believe it might matter. It is so frightening to know I could be present with all of this and not numb it out. Not choke it off. Like that’s an option. One I always thought was kinda bullshit. Who doesn’t want the fuck out of this place more than half the time? Most of us do I think. We have not learned to live only to run, run, run. Bury, hide, lie. I see her smile in the bathroom mirror hanging over the sink. I see the lakes of gray pain in her wide wet eyes. Touch the glass. Fall through to the other side of the mouth of the fear. I like the ones who dare at least to destroy the distractions. I have been so good at building them all my life. And underneath this white dome sky, breathing in the damp cold mean January air, I can sense those distractions for the ghosts they really are. Not out there or in here. But oh so haunting close by.

21 Replies to “Glass Touch (audio)”

  1. Glass touch… a mirror staring back. Thoughts of the end. You might have miscalculated the time we want the fuck out of here. Half the time sounds actually pleasant for it reminds me of younger days when hope and belief were the main ingredients of everyday. Sadly shit starts to tip towards the darkness more and more. Once there are far few days of light that try to fight of the sea of darkness a glass or a few come to the rescue. I guzzle down another one and the soft and cosy shine all around appears. It ignites the remaining piles of darkness that sit so deep inside me. Incinerates yesterday’s sorrow. And I feel forever young all over again…
    Allison, you are a fucking genius! You simply are… ❀️

    Liked by 3 people

    1. My sweet, I do believe I miscalculate a lot of things. You are so generous and kind… mostly I feel like a wasteful fool burning away precious irreplaceable time. But you are a shimmer with your quiet attentiveness, a glimpse of hopeful fireside light. For this I thank you deeply. βœ¨πŸ•ŠπŸ€πŸ•Šβœ¨

      Liked by 3 people

      1. Ohhh… believe me that your time is not wasted whenever you grab a pen or a keyboard in your hand. While I can’t speak for how you feel in the end I can assure you that the result of your literary explorations and creations leave a deep mark on the reader. Your words flow with such incredible gusto that it matters not if they sometimes unearth a painful memory or experience because they possess a healing power as well. Their magic lies in uncensored rawness and honesty. It’s hard to explain, however, one thing I do know – there are not many if any artists that can so beautifully enchant like you can with your potent string of moments that represent a perfect insight in chaos that life is. So, dear Allison, I do hope you will continue to share your mesmerizing mind and talent with us. Because, you fucking rock beyond! (I know, I know, I had to ruin it all with the so called “pardon my French” bit a t the end. But hey, life is chaos and sometimes “French” words need to be uttered or screamed or shrieked or whispered….)

        Liked by 3 people

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