Bored to near tears, I take myself for a walk outside the office underneath the wide open sky. Heavy dark clouds hang low over the soccer fields making the perfectly cut green grass appear a kind of back-lit electric yellow. There is a flashing pulse in the air which reminds me I am still alive and I’m glad for it because nothing much else courses through me all day aside from stale coffee and the low hum of whatever kind of sickening atmosphere happens between drab gray carpeting and drab gray walls.
They want us all to get the shots if we haven’t already which makes perfect sense to most of us and infuriates the rest. They write letters and sign them and send them off to anybody who will listen. It’s not going to end well and if you think we are anywhere near the end you are dead wrong or possibly right on the money, anybody’s guess.
As for me, I let my mind wander off into a fantasy of leaving this place for good or even just for a little while. Walking with you and talking about all the hard shit nobody else dares to explore. It is entirely possible I am too judgemental. But to be honest the world we live in now is such a mess I am not even sure where to begin the day or end the night anymore. I love the darkness round the clock and used to know when to run my mouth and when to keep quiet.
But everything lately feels up for grabs. Sanity, creativity, sensuality, morbidity.
They want you to want to be a leader. Fix something, save something, create something out of nothing but only if it’ll get you fast cash or social media status. There is a callousness all around that would scare the living shit out of me if I let myself feel it. But mostly I just clench my jaw, dig my fingernails into my skin, and watch the sky to try to understand what it means to have an honest reaction to the patterns of troubled weather inside me.
Allison Marie Conway 
We live in times of great changes… many feel that life right now is like an emotional roller ride… so important to be grounded, I opine. All the best. 🙏🏻💕🙏🏻
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Ground shifting times indeed. Thank you so kindly for reading I am most grateful. 🌹🕊
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“There is a callousness all around that would scare the living shit out of me if I let myself feel it.” This is so true right now…and I refuse to let my heart be penetrated by this cold, hardness around us…You are spot on as usual. Excellent piece, Allison🙏🏾🐚💜
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You are strong and wise, dearest Lisa. It means so much to me that this resonated for you, though it’s also a touch tragic a thing. Thank you as ever and always for your gracious heart. ♥️🌹🕊🕊
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Thank you, sweet warrior with such a gift with words.🕊🕊🐚🐚
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Such a glowing warmth you are, beautiful love. Onward we go… ♥️🕊
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🥰😇 Yes my love, onward we go…
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I felt this. Oh, how I felt this! 💔
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I feel you, Isha. Thank you so much for letting the words in. ♥️🕊🕊
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Reblogged this on The Reluctant Poet.
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Thank you 🙏🏻🌹
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Always a joy and pleasure to read and share your posts with followers, My Dear! Have a great day!!
xoxox 😘💕🎁🌹
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Always such a provocative voice.
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Perhaps I’m twisted but that makes my soul sing. 🕊🖤🕊
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I am glad
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🌹🙏🏻🌹
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