Posted on by Allison Marie Conway

Virus (audio)

Click the play button to hear me read this to you. It feels like a time for reading to each other, I don’t know… I hope you like it and if you do let me know and I can read more each day….

Fairly unnerved, I sit atop the little bed in my writing room sipping coffee and staring blankly out the window. Birds are chirping their various greetings and announcements from trees near and far through the dense fog which obscures a clear view of anything in the distance. The thickness of the air is strange but other than that the scene appears much as it always has. Early morning, hazy light. Rooftops among bare branches, tiny windows and inside them, tiny pale yellow lights. I can hear the rushing sounds of the highway a few blocks away, but on my street the parked cars stay put. Dog walkers, a runner, but no children walk by to school. No school. In a time like this, with the COVID-19 virus spreading like invisible wildfire, it strikes me that there has never been a time like this. Not that I have lived through. Hope to live through. And I look around me, observing, as any artist does, the reactions and emotions of people, and of myself. I see cycles. There are spirals, there are tracks we race around like figure eights, climbing up, spinning down. I go from anger to fear to rage to rage to fear to anger to planning to compassion to love to strength to helplessness to hopelessness to heart, and all around and back again in a matter of moments which repeat in a loop but the loop feels endless and new and dreadful and old and stale and jarring and shocking and surreal and numbing all at once. Repeat, repeat, repeat, check the news, repeat. And coffee. Much coffee. And while over the past few months I have told so many stories I’ve lost count, the only thing I can think about right now is nothing and everything in a terrible clashing symphony inside my head. My little plants reach for the sheer washes of light which mist through my open window. They are green and leafy and reaching, little creatures of springtime silence. And I thought I would read this all to you, let you hear my voice. Not because I have anything profound or even necessarily helpful to say, because I don’t. But some voice inside keeps asking me to be a voice on the outside, maybe just to let you know I am here. And in a way, here with you.

35 Replies to “Virus (audio)”

      1. Thank you very much… things in China are not quite as crazy as they were a couple of weeks ago, but we’re not out of the woods yet. And yes, voice recording is sometimes a meditative experience! Keep it up, because your stories really come to life with your voice. Cheers

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        1. This thing we are up against is overwhelming. It is sometimes a bit of relief to hear a voice out in the wilderness, even if it is just our own. Thank you for your encouragement, you are very kind and I’m so grateful. Cheers to you. ❤

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    1. Thank you so kindly, Dave, for giving this a listen. I do hope it was soothing, it was just a little thing I did off the cuff but I wanted to put my heart out there, there is so much fear right now. ❤ I hope you are doing okay. ❤

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        1. It’s weird, I usually feel so removed from this strange world. With all this sadness and fear, I suddenly feel right smack in the middle of it. Will take us all some time to process I guess….meanwhile, I love that you are here. Thank you so much. 🙏🏻🌹💋❤️💜

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  6. YOU have a really nice voice. No wonder everyone is urging you to do this more often.
    This is a depressing time when we have no choice but to stay away, at a distance amid the rising panic. It feels like a bad dream. I just hope this gets over soon. Listening to your voice did feel like a connection. I might play it more than once. 😉

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    1. Oh thank you, I am truly so grateful. It is a depressing time, a very hard time. I’m so glad you gave this a listen, that hearing my voice soothes you a little bit. Please play it as often as you enjoy it. We all need moments of solace right now, even if they come in little 3 minute bursts. 🙂 Hoping you are safe and well, my friend. ❤ ❤

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  7. It was very nice to hear your sweet voice. You excited me, you sent me through time between the school desks with the English teacher. I love you❤️❤️

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    1. My dear sweet Soul. I am so grateful for your lovely comment, you make me smile thinking of going back in time. I’m so touched my voice could soothe you a little bit during this maddening time. I love you. Adore your brave dark heart. Please take good care.❤️ Maybe another story time tomorrow. 🙏🏻🌹🖤🖤❤️

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      1. Yes Marie it was moving to hear your voice.
        For a moment you made me become a school boy.
        I will take care of myself until the last breath.
        With another story I will definitely fall in love with you ❤️🖤🌹
        Take care!

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  10. Thank you so much for sharing these words, of connection, of moving through these unprecedented times. It feels of Solidarity in our uncertainty. A moment of calm truth between opposite sides of the earth. And The Words carry me safely forwards. Your Words beckon a daring bravery of spirit to come forth through the confusion and suppressed panic, to Be More, to Be Myself, to be the powerful guardian of this Mind Body Spirit vessel. 💖🙏🌹✨

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